Rights: Ole Johnny Hansen for afroginthefjord.com

Dating in Norway: the Strangest things only Norwegian men say

Rights: Ole Johnny Hansen for afroginthefjord.com
Rights: Ole Johnny Hansen for afroginthefjord.com

All of these are true, either experienced by me or some of my female friends. Okay okay, some I made up, not that many actually. Hey, no one said it was illegal to have a little imagination🙂 You can try to guess which ones I made up though, a good test to know whether you know Norwegian society well, or whether you know me well.

1. Do you want to have kids with me? If not, let me know. I am 35, no time to lose with you.

2. How many times per week do you train?

3. Do you want to be my “venn med fordell”?
Me: Your what?
Guy: Friend with benefits, you know, sex.

4. Do you like friluftsliv?

5. Don’t stand so close to my car. It’s a Tesla you know, very expensive.

6. Are you drunk? I mean drunk enough not to remember what we are about to do?

7. Which country do you come from? Oh I have a that country coloured already on my world map of origin of girls I had sex with. If you know any girl from Fiji, North Korea or Romania let me know, I am interested!

8. Guy: Would you move away from Oslo?
Girl: To where for example?
Guy: To the village in Trøndelag I grew up in and live 30 meters away from my parents. You know, for our kids to grow up in nature and stuff.
Girl: What’s your name again?
Guy: Nevermind.

9. It was such a koselig evening we spent together don’t you think?

10. To the waiter: No we’re paying separate.
To me: You had a drink more than me, don’t forget to pay everything you had tonight.
Me, quietly: Screw likestilling.

11. I really like the whale burger here, you should get that.

12. Do you want to snus?

13. Guy: Which novel from Knausgård do you prefer?
Me: I don’t know, I haven’t read any of them.
Guy: (surprised) You don’t read Knausgård? But what DO you read then?

14. Why are you so short? Is there a genetic problem in your family?

15. Do you eat lutefisk?

16. Do you want to become a Norwegian citizen? Why not? Norway is the greatest place in the world you know.

18. Oh you’re that French girl who writes about Norwegians. How many readers do you get every week. Wow so many? Can you write about me?

19. What is your 5-year plan?

20. Did you hurt yourself when I banged the glass door in your face? Oh you expected me to hold the door for you? Sweety, this is Norway, women are not treated like children here, they are expected to hold and carry everything themselves. It’s called gender equality. (Again, screy you gender equality – sometimes).

This is mostly about what Norwegian men say, if you have any input on strange things Norwegian women say on dates, be my guest and contact me with your ideas! Also, if you have other input on things men say, bring it on. Note: this was inspired by a twitter competition called #FirstDateQuestions

30 thoughts on “Dating in Norway: the Strangest things only Norwegian men say

  1. 1 – 5 and 14 , is my guess that you used your imagination😉 Norwegians are mostly diplomatic in this case and don’t talk it out also I saw lot of them who like shorter girls


    1. I could say the no.14 is real. My husband (Norwegian) actually did it when we were dating🙂. Not exactly the same sentence, but he was wondering why I’m so short and he has always been 30cm lonely while we talking a walk.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Norwegian men don’t seem to understand that there’s something called “being polite” which is not contradictory to gender equality. I do know a couple of Norwegian men who actually hold the door for a woman, and pull out her chair in a restaurant and things like that, and I have suggested for them that they arrange courses for their friends in good behavior😉

    Liked by 2 people

  3. No idea, they all sound likely. Perhaps not the one about the door in your face. Mind, Norwegian men is likely not to hold the door for you, but I don’t think the would say exactly those things.


  4. Twelve years ago my Norwegian language teacher ,Aud, told me to never lose my ” Englishness”. I now realise what she meant. Keep holding the doors, keep saying please and thankyou and keep speaking your mind . I have .

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Hi Elena
      Actually this rumor used to be true. At the time of Versailles French people did not wash themselves in the palace and if I remember well there were no proper toilets, and therefore they smelled very bad. hence the reputation that is following us until now🙂 But I am pretty sure modern French people take showers every day.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Norway seems to have real gender equality and not fake one like rest of the countries where men still have to chase them and pay for them and drive them and do everything in between and won’t even get thanks in return.


    1. Gentleman is a British middle class concept, so no, you will not find many of those in Norway. And a good thing too I believe. I think we have to do our best to maintain those sides of our society that makes it little hierarchical. Our flat social structure is a huge strength. It is however very much under attack.

      Of course, this does not mean we need to be inconsiderate.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. It`s not a concept , it`s something to do with your upbringing . Having manners crosses all class barriers . ” Flat social structure ” !! Only in Scandinavia can you get away with that BS .


      2. This one is meant for Dave Smiths last comment, as it was not possible to reply to it. Of course it has to do with your upbringing! Do you believe English upbringing is universal? It is a cultural thing. Same goes for your definition of manners.


  6. I think these two about gender equality make a man sound like a jerk. It doesn’t seem natural, but more like “you still want your equality, bitch?”. It would be completely fine to say you’re paying for yourself (unless you’re the one who invited someone to that place, obviously) and that’s all, no hinting that not paying is your revenge for the equality. And it would be completely fine to not hold the door (isn’t it a Norwegian thing though? In some countries everyone holds the door for everyone, not just men for women.. or no one for no one for that matter :p). I’m fine with not having the door opened for me (lol), but if you make a comment like the one posted in 20, you sound sexist. You wouldn’t say that to a man from abroad, who expected politeness from you (“Oh you expected me to hold the door for you? Sweetie, this is Norway. People don’t do that for each other here”).

    Liked by 2 people

  7. Seldom we hear anything particular quirky about Norwegians from Dutch and German bloggers.

    There is one finnish example, but i have lived in Finland, and knows that she is never going back there.


    1. Oh I am a German living in Norway and I am even from Berlin which is known for a bit of rough tough attitude and I find the lack of charm and manners in Norwegians quite tough to handle. It does not make a difference if I get stuck in a door together with a man, because he did not let me go first or if my Norwegian (and very charming) boyfriend holds a door for a woman and she just walks through with that slightly pissed expression on her face that people here master so well. I agree with what was said before likestilling should not be mistaken with bad manners and impoliteness. I happily hold the door for an elderly man and let people get off the train first before I enter, man or woman.


  8. I think most of those questions and behavior above are so reasonable. Especially no. 1, 2, 4 etc. Would love a guy to ask me no. 8, 9, 13, 15 (I love lutefisk!), 16 or talking about 5 year plans. I agree about gender equality but while my short stays in Norge, noone banged the door in my face. Most of the guys were polite enough to hold the door for me etc. I guess this is probably because they knew how it was in Europe. And that made them even cuter!🙂


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